Cross-cultural relationships: I almost lost faith in love

The story of Danny and Andrea

Questions to Her

On our first date…
I will call our first date the first meeting at the airport. I was super shy but really excited. I had a lot of thoughts in my mind because I didn’t want to act weird or do something stupid. When I saw him I didn’t know what to say or how to act but I was really happy. I can’t explain how I felt like but in any case, it was wonderful. Also, I was pretty fascinated to see my man finally and whenever he didn’t look at me I couldn’t stop staring at him.

During the first months of dating my deal-breaker would be…
Any kind of cheating.

I learned He is right me when…
I noticed I could tell him everything no matter what it is. He never blamed me for anything instead he always tries to help me. He made me forget everything that is bad, also all people I used to talk to a lot were suddenly not interesting anymore. He is the most interesting and the most special person to me. I fell in love with him really fast and I have never had doubts. There was no regret or a feeling that my heart is making a mistake. No one could ever make me feel so good as he does.

I had culture shock when He…
I didn’t have culture shock yet but let’s see what the future brings!

amwf asian boyfriend3 things I love about Him are…
It’s hard to say because I love everything about him. But my top three are:
He’s a very caring person, as cold as he seems to be he is a very friendly person and who cares about others and it’s obvious when you get closer to him.
Secondly, sometimes we are super weirdoes and we can talk about the strangest things and laugh together without being embarrassed.
Third, I love the way he loves me. He always shows me that I am his everything and he always knows what I need. He can be really affectionate and cheesy when it comes to this point, for example, some of his messages make me melt.

The most beautiful thing He ever did for me was…
when he proposed to me. For many people, it might be too fast but for me, it was the most beautiful thing he ever did for me. I knew from the beginning that he is the person I want to spend my life with because he is completing me.

During this relationship, I learned about myself that…
it is important to open up to others. I used to keep every problem to myself and it made my depression worse. I learned it doesn’t make sense. It’s better to talk to someone you trust fully and it doesn’t matter if the situation is solved or not. At least you feel better because it takes a lot of burden off.

If there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Western girlfriends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
Be confident for your man of dreams. True love will always win the fight against the distance, family problems or cultural norms. It’s important to break the rules and show the world that everyone is the same, no matter the race.

burmese boyriend myanmarQuestions to Him

Asking Her out for the first time was…
I noticed she has 6 or 7 piercings on her face and I thought it was pretty cool so I just let her know that her piercings are cool and we just happened to talk a lot after this. After few weeks I was already in love with her but I didn’t have the courage to say that. I thought she isn’t interested in me but well she was and I confessed my love to her.

I learned She is right for me when…
I felt that I was actually in love again. It felt like a REAL LOVE. Because of what happened in my previous relationship I never wanted to be in a relationship again. I pretty much lost faith in love. Another main thing was just what kind of person she was. She got everything I could wish for in a girl. She helps me a lot with my depression that has been going on for a while because of some family problems I have got. Even though she doesn’t realize that she is still helping me.

I had culture shock when She…
Since I grew up in a Western country and pretty much I spent most of my life in Italian and Greek areas, not to mention most of my mates have all different backgrounds (American, Russian, Finnish, Portuguese and Colombians) the cultural differences have never been a problem for me having grown up in a diverse environment.

3 things I love about Her are…
well, it’s really a tough question since I love almost everything about her. If I had to pick three then the first one was how faithful she is to me. I had some doubts, I am not going to lie, but she proved that there are still good girls existing on this planet. She is definitely the best among them for me. The second thing I love about her is how good of a girl she is, she doesn’t drink, smoke doesn’t go to clubs. It is really hard to find a girl like this nowadays. Third is how strong she is. Even though she might sound weak sometimes, this girl can endure a lot of hardships and bring herself back up. What else can I ask more when I have such a good fiancée and yes I proposed to her. It was the best day of my life.

The biggest misconception about Her country and culture was…
Well everyone seems to think Germany is a racist country especially when a non-Caucasian person is dating a Caucasian girl. I thought it’s going to be a problem and when I found out she is Polish origin I had some worries. My ex-girlfriend who cheated on me after so many years and made me lose faith in love and women was Polish…as well pretty much all my mates from Europe warned me about Polish girls, but again – she proved everything wrong. Generalizing is just wrong.

The things that She likes to do for fun with me are…
She likes shopping with me, cuddling and watching horror movies together.

She hates when I…
drink alcohol, smoke, going to clubs. I have stopped doing two of these things for good, apart from smoking. It isn’t that easy! My smokers-brothers know that haha but I am trying to quit.

During this relationship the most important thing I learned about myself was…
Being honest. I went through really hard times before I met her and I just didn’t want to focus on my future. At that time I just started to travel everywhere in Asia especially Myanmar (Burma) since I am of a Burmese origin and all I did was backpacking, getting drunk and partying. Since I got into this relationship I realized I have to get my life back together and do what I have been doing so I started saving money. It made me realize how important it was to take care of someone I love. So I stopped messing around.

international love adviceIf there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Asian friends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
Don’t be shy, don’t let anything or anyone stop you; we live in the 21st century. This might be a bit hard to do for the “Asian Asians” than the “Western Asians” like me because Asians from Asia seems to be a bit anti-social. Even us – the “Western Asians” have problems when trying to make friends with them. It might be due to the language barrier but on the other hand, you won’t learn the language if you only stick to your own group and speak your own language! My advice is to go out and more make friends with everyone regardless of their race and religion.
Once you get that confidence you can do everything you want, trust me. Another thing is culture, no matter if you are a Western Asian or an Asian living in Asia the family is always the tough part to deal with since most Asians parents stick to their culture and prefer the same race to theirs. No matter where you live, they will put pressure on you about your Caucasian or Latin girlfriends and they can force you to get an Asian girl. You have to stand up for yourself, it is about you, your love and your life.

If you want to see more check out Danny’s Instagram!