The story of Sunny and Jason
I am from Romania and he is from Hong Kong. We’ve been together for over 2 years. Things went super fast with us as we did not even have too much time together. Two years ago both of us were volunteers in a project, that is how we met and as I was his translator we got to spend quite a lot of time together so that is how we realized we could make a good couple. Initially, he was supposed to stay in Romania for only 5 weeks, but love made him stay for 3 months. After he left my country things were quite difficult as we had to do a long distance relationship. We are still in a long distance relationship but this September we will break the distance as we will get married in my country and then move to Hong Kong.
Questions to Her
On Our first date…
I went through so many emotions. I was nervous but then I was perfectly fine. I felt like I’d known him for years and that felt very warm. We had a not typical first date, nothing was planned, it all happened all of a sudden. We were at a party and we were playing games. At that time I would have already given up on the idea of us being a couple as that meant at least a 2-year long distance relationship. But still, something happened. As we were playing hide and seek (yeah, it was an interesting party) he grabbed my hand and that started it all. Short after that, the game ended the weather got all weird so I felt super cold. He got me his shirt and spent the entire time trying to keep me warm. Pretty much our first date consisted in him hugging me for hours and hours and hours and kissing my forehead, just that. That was the sweetest and most innocent first date and it was for sure more than perfect.
During the first months of dating my deal-breaker would be…
his way of saying things. As we are in a long distance relationship we’ve spent the majority of the time away from each other and understanding each other was a tough challenge in the beginning. He has this thing where he says something just for the sake of him saying it, but in reality, he does not mean it. He likes the way I react when he annoys me and tries to do that on regular basis. Now, I’ve gotten used to it and I know the silly things he says are not true and he does it just for fun, but at the beginning of our relationship, I’ve felt so frustrated.
I learned He is right for me when…
First time I looked at him as a potential boyfriend was when I was his translator and we were crossing the street and I noticed he would always move to the side where the cars were coming. When I asked him why he would do that he looked at me and said: “In case a car doesn’t stop in time it hits me”. I did not expect someone I had barely known to do that for me so I for sure felt flattered. That was the first time I saw him as a potential boyfriend but knowing he was truly the one for me happened one year later. Last year, he was on a 2-month visit to Romania and we had a terribly bad luck. I got chicken pox so I had to stay indoors for 2 weeks. During those two weeks he was by my side the entire time, he would barely sleep at night, he would be so sad and even cried because I felt uncomfortable. It was just chicken pox but he was so sad and he tried his best to make me feel better.
I had a cultural shock when He…
would not care that much about special days or holidays. I am the type of person that gets into Christmas spirit right after summer ends, I like to make a lot of Christmas preparations, watch Christmas movies and all of that but I was so shocked to find out that he first celebrated Christmas in 2016 when he came to visit me.
3 things I love about Him are…
- He tries his best to make me happy. For example, this year I spent my birthday in Hong Kong away from my friends and family and I had great expectations for it. He woke up at 5 am (00:00 Romania time) to surprise me and to wish me Happy Birthday. Then he got me all the things I wanted. Unfortunately, he had to work during the day so the best he could offer me was a dinner and a simple cake. As he realized that did not make me 100% happy he did something amazing. The following day I had my second birthday celebration. I got to spend an amazing full day of surprises and when came back home things got even better, he had ordered a very pretty cake ( there was a time I sent him a picture of a pink rose cake and jokingly told him to buy it for me, well, he for sure did it for that day).
- When I am with him I feel most comfortable. I could say or do anything as I know he loves all of me.
- He respects all my decisions and tries to be a better person for me. For example, I became a vegetarian and he was a big meat lover, however this year he decided to be a pescetarian. He likes to cook for me while he wants me to do nothing. His parents have told me he never cooked for them but he always does it for me.
The biggest misconception about His country and culture was…
the way people act. I thought they would be all shy and more reserved. Turns out they are very friendly and outgoing and also very curious about my story. I expected to be surrounded by cold people but everyone is just so sweet and kind.
The most beautiful thing He ever did for me was…
to give up on his flight ticket in order to spend more time with me. When he came here as a volunteer he was supposed to stay here for 5 weeks, but he ended up staying here for 3 months. I never imagined he would do it for me especially because at that time we had only known each other for less than a month. Still, he decided that spending more time with me was the right thing to do and to be honest I think that is the reason why our relationship got stronger as our feelings got stronger during that time.
During this relationship, the most important thing I learned about myself was…
to live at the moment. I would always look forward to the times we met but then I could not enjoy it as I would think from the moment we were separated again. Slowly, I looked at things differently and enjoyed every moment.
If there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Western girlfriends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
be open-minded and accept your differences. It is important that both of you to try to understand and respect the other’s culture and customs. Also, I think it is quite important to try to learn each other’s native language as you will face situations where you cannot communicate with their family.
Questions to Him
Asking Her out for the first time was…
a bit nervous and uncertain… I was wondering if dating a foreigner was even possible. She was my translator, a very cute translator but she was nice to me because she was supposed to, right? I thought I could at least try. If she said okay, we could try to make the relationship work. For the first date, I put on my coolest shirt and perfume hoping to impress her. She was so cute! I was nervous, but when I got to know her more, I realized how easy going and cute she was, so I didn’t feel insecure anymore. I took the lead and held her hand and that is how it all started.
I learned She is right for me when…
Well, after the first date, I was in love, every moment I was missing her so much, in the morning, when I was eating, when doing random things. I was always thinking of her, that was the reason.
I had a cultural shock when She…
insists so much on the celebrations of special days. In my country, we celebrate Chinese New Year so much, but we don’t really celebrate the Easter, Christmas, Name days… I mean we do celebrate, but we don’t put so much emphasis there. I got so much trouble several times because I didn’t prepare that well. Now I know it, duh! Actually, having a decent celebration for the special days is not bad and I accept and support that! Also, she hates my food! Not all the food, but it is very difficult to find traditional Chinese food she likes, she is a very picky eater, very very very. I remember the first time I cooked for her was Chinese style seafood and vegetables, she hated it…although she tried to be nice about it. Now, I know her taste and I can say she loves some dishes I make.
3 things I love about Her are…
- The name of Sunny really fits her personality. She is simple, always feeling happy and positive which is the good way I should learn to live by too. There is not much to say, we could go through challenges one by one as long as we could hold our hands and be happy.
- Saving money, and not easy to buy things. I will usually spend money if I see something interesting on street. But she doesn’t. I asked her, and she said it is useless, why would I buy it?
- She is a good, sweet girl. I love her taking care of me all the time, thinking of me all the time, annoying me all the time.
The biggest misconception about Her country and culture was…
people are really independent. I didn’t realize people are that strong. They are doing things and working by themselves no matter what age, no matter what situation. They try not to receive help . They try, and they try and never give up!
The things that She likes to do for fun with me are…
putting on makeup, giving me tons of makeovers. SHE LOVES TO act like my personal stylist. She also loves traveling, taking pictures and eating ice cream. She loves ice cream. OH, she also forces me to watch Korean dramas with her, she is so happy when we do it.
She hates when I…
am not “taking care” of my appearance. Before knowing her I didn’t care too much about my appearance, but she is the type of person that spends a long time to get ready, putting on all types of creams, getting all that pretty clothes.
During this relationship the most important thing I learned about myself was…
taking care of skin, putting on suncream and trying to make a minimum effort to look decent.
If there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Asian friends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
try to accept new things. Many cultural differences may shock you, so always keep your mind open. Also, you should have a really good plan for each other and plan for your future.
