The story of Courtney and Min
Courtney and Min met through their respective jobs in May of 2014. Min was working IT for the company Courtney was a waitress for. After finding her on Instagram, they began to chat. Though they had 22 years and a 7-hour drive between them, they fell in love after a few months of messaging through Kik. On October 10th, 2015, Courtney flew to Indianapolis from Kansas City to meet him for the first time. Now 3 years later, they live, laugh, and love together in Indianapolis with their few month old daughter.
Questions to Her
On Our first date…
He picked me up from the airport holding a bouquet of roses and looking very handsome… We hugged for probably 10 minutes and began walking towards his car. He started kissing me on my cheeks, trying to get to my mouth, so I turned my head, and we had our first kiss! He still claims I kissed him first, but this, obviously, is false. We then went to an Asian Fusion restaurant and ate sushi and seafood. After eating, he took me to a convenience store and bought me Band-Aids for my feet, because I had bought new stilettos to meet him in, and they were ripping up my feet. It was so embarrassing!
During the first months of dating my deal-breaker would be…
If he had made fun of me or mocked me for the different things I struggled with mentally and physically. I had never had anyone be there for me until him.
I learned He is right for me when…
I realized that I never once felt uncomfortable around him. He made me feel protected, loved, and like I could be myself when I’d really never felt that way before with anyone. I think one of the biggest deals for me was that I could eat in front of him from the beginning without ever feeling embarrassed. I struggled with anorexia since childhood and had literally never felt that way in my life.
I had a cultural shock when He…
Well, he moved to the USA from Korea when he was younger, so we never really had a culture shock.
3 things I love about Him are…
His sense of humor, he is so funny and can make anything a joke and make me laugh for hours. His endless patience, I can be quite a handful sometimes, and he never gets upset with my shortcomings. He is there for me always. His love of affection, I am a very needy person, so I am glad to have found someone who loves to cuddle almost as much as I do!
The biggest misconception about His country and culture was…
I really didn’t know anything about Korean culture. I had literally only met two Asian people in my life until I turned 17, and even then, only one of them was Korean. There were many misconceptions that I had, but I always asked instead of assuming, since I knew that I was completely ignorant in that area. I think the biggest misconception would be that all Asian cultures would be the same, regardless of the country.
The most beautiful thing He ever did for me was…
Choose me to share his life with and give me our beautiful daughter. Marrying him and starting a family with him is all I could ever ask for.
During this relationship the most important thing I learned about myself was…
That I have more worth than I was raised to believe that I did, that I mean more, and that I matter. I could never have believed that without him.
If there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Western girlfriends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
To be understanding of their culture and heritage rather than expecting him to just change to your way of thinking. You are different people with different backgrounds, so be patient with each other, and don’t try to change the other person just because it would be easier. Don’t base your ideas of them on the racist portrayals of Asian men in Western media. It is not only extremely untrue, it can be very damaging to their self-esteem, self-worth, and mental health. Asian culture is so complex and so beautiful, so open your heart and don’t hold yourself back from experiencing and learning everything you can about it.
Questions to Him
Asking Her out for the first time was…
exciting. Just knowing that I get to be with her and see her in person for the first time. I loved everything about her and was scared since many online relationships don’t work out due to unrealistic expectations but she was PERFECT!
I learned She is right for me when…
She said I will kill you if you ever leave me 😉 Just kidding. It was when I realized that she always made me feel like I was her priority and that my happiness was her happiness.
I had a cultural shock when She…
used chopsticks on our first date. She was as good as I was and she actually loved spicy food.
3 things I love about Her are…
Only 3?!?! Well, she is super sweet and affectionate… I can’t get enough of her loving hugs and kisses. Her SMILE! It lights up my heart. Her innocence. Her heart is pure and she loves with all its capacity.
The biggest misconception about Her country and culture was…
I grew up in here so there wasn’t anything.
The things that She likes to do for fun with me are…
Play board games, watch movies, go out on dates, swimming… Punching me!!!
She hates when I…
tease her. I’m very playful and like to tease. I enjoy getting a rise out of her because she acts so CUTE when she throws a fit.
During this relationship the most important thing I learned about myself was…
to show and tell her how much I love her. I tend to show through my actions but I know that she likes to hear it.
If there is a piece of advice I could give to my fellow Asian friends who are into the AMWF relationships that would be…
Be patient and don’t judge the other person because they may be ”different.” Get to know each other like any other person and love them for who they are. People will give you odd looks because the couple is not what they consider “traditional,” but I take it as being special, and everyone is just jealous that we have something they don’t. Try to learn more about your differences and work with them. Courtney is a vegetarian, so I make American and Korean dishes with no meat. She is also learning Korean so we can teach our daughter about the beauty of both of our cultures… This just makes me love her even more!
